


Failsafe

by CAPSING



Category: Marvel, Spider-Man: Homecoming (2017)
Genre: AND YOU CAN BET IT'S THE PUREST BEST HEART IN ALL THE MULTIVERSE, Ableist Language, Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Anxiety, Character Study, Gen, Past Child Abuse, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Spoilers, Tony Stark Has A Heart, Tony has the self-esteem of a carpet
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-07-10
Updated: 2017-07-10
Packaged: 2018-11-30 10:26:32
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,701
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11461683
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CAPSING/pseuds/CAPSING
Summary: Reality never misses a chance to rub Tony’s face into the fact he can’t keep anyone safe.Not really.





	Failsafe

**Author's Note:**

> **THIS HAS SPOILERS FOR THE MOVIE**  
>  I JUST LOVE TONY STARK SO MUCH  
> BUT at the ending, child endangerment was suddenly A-Okay again?  
> SO. THIS.

The problem with Spider-Man, Tony thinks, starts with the name; a classic case of false advertising.

(Another reason to try and take Tony to court.)

It’s already caught, so it can’t be rebranded – and it’s definitely better than Spider-Guy. Only said Spider is far from being a man – by ten years, a driver’s license and one Mulan montage.

It continues with Tony.

It’s Tony that had given him the boost in his wavering confidence, making Peter believe he owes to the world much more than he is in truth. Tony who had given him false hopes, along with the suit.

It’s Tony who doesn’t know what the fuck was he thinking, and what the hell is he supposed to do now.

 

On the one hand, he needs to stay far, far away from the boy. Tony’s a bad influence– the worst influence, that kind that gets people killed or crippled, either mentally or physically. He had ruined the life of every teenager he’d come in contact with ( _if they even managed to stay alive_ ); he minimalizes his interactions with Wanda to the bare minimum possible, considering she’s a fellow Avenger, now.

Thinking about Peter in another large-scale fight has Tony hyperventilating in the bathroom between board meetings, reciting every one of the five-hundred and thirthy-four plans he wired into the suit under his breath, analyzing his design as he did countless of times in dozens of sleepless nights. _Peter is safe_ , he tells himself, and actively avoids recalling the long seconds of watching the boy spread on the asphalt, limp like a wet rag, and the vivid image he envisioned back then, of May’s crying face and red eyes spitting at Tony’s face, the fault of another life snuffed by his own hands.

On the other hand, ignoring the problem – Tony’s favorite modus operandi in regards to Life – doesn’t seem to do any good. He listens to every one of Peter’s voice messages, hacking into Happy’s voicemail; he could’ve asked, he supposes, but Happy is testy as it is.x Tony doesn’t want to give him the impression he doesn’t count on Happy to deliver the important things, not with Happy’s ego on the line – not when Tony knows Happy still blames himself for the person he no longer is. Ever since the incident six years ago, Happy’s temperament had considerably shortened, and his migraines sure didn’t help.

Brain injuries do that, Tony supposes.

 

Ignoring the problem doesn’t make it go away, but facing it isn’t an option, either. Not when just getting anywhere near the late Avengers building has him breaking into cold sweat; when the streets of New York, tidied up and clean of rubble, has memories buzzing underneath them like a swarm, flowing along the pipes and chasing after Tony until they chased him off the city.

The opportunities the alien technology presents are like a Pandora Box Tony is resolved not to open, even if it means he’d have to cut his own hands off (since Bruce is no longer there to stay his hand). The secrets to the threat looming over Earth hides within them, the threat Tony knows he has to figure out before it’s too late.

Thor might’ve had answers, but he is further from them, even from Bruce; it was never his planet to begin with. For Thor Earth is just a branch in the overall Galaxy-Tree or whatever jibber-jabber they have on Asgard, and its roots don’t need Earth to thrive and prosper. Tony rubs his throat and grimaces. He can’t count on a God to save them; not when a different one almost brought Earth to its knees on its path to ruin.

Tony’s no diplomat and isn’t one for long-term strategy. He’s an inventor and a scientist; that’s what he can offer for Earth’s uncertain future.

Only.

The last time Tony meddled with alien technology, it had cost him JARVIS.

 

Tony is a selfish man, so he calls the FBI, since he’s running out of people to lose – too many names crossed from a list that was already short to begin with.

“Anything else, Sir?” Friday asks in his ear, and her voice gives him the conviction he lacks.

“No, that’s dealt with,” Tony replies in a cheery tone, and calls Pepper to distract himself from his own lies.

(And just to remind himself he can, again.)

* * *

 

There’s a reason Tony Stark would never have children. He’d come to this decision fairly early in life, because he’s a smart guy who raced through the different mark-points in the way of becoming an adult – and this one, he had chosen to skip and leave far behind him.

There’s a list, actually, and if Tony cared for it, it could’ve been made into a Best Seller that would’ve brought Oprah’s book club back from the dead.

The main reasons are as follows:

  1. He’s fucked-up.
  2. He’d fuck them up.
  3. Nobody deserves that.



That’s the most responsible thing he can do as a parent –  is actively avoid from being one. On the cusp of fifty, Tony’s life is like a slow-motion train wreck with him tied down to the rails. There isn’t much leverage carried in such a position, not enough mobility to shape another human being properly.

(There’s definitely isn’t a reason down this list brought up by a drunken haze, a terrifying realization that if his kid turned up looking like Howard, Tony could never bring himself to love him, truly.)

 

Peter gives him ample proof that he made the right call.

After Tony pieced together the ruined ferry, Peter sees nothing but his own goals, impossibly blind to how close he was to dying once more, head stuffed with fantasies instead of memories. Peter blames him for not listening to him, tells him he doesn’t care. Stepping out of the suit and onto the roof you’d think Tony’s blood would cool, but it boils in his veins steadily. He is so angry he can barely quip more than a few sentences, the motions of his body stilted; he leashes himself, less he lash out, because Peter’s _a child_ and Tony is an adult who knows better. Peter can bench-press a truck, but he isn’t strong enough to face the full extent of Tony’s wrath in a mild-nervous-breakdown. His righteousness was going to get him killed (–and didn’t that rub some salt on re-opened wounds–) but he wasn’t doing it to shorten Tony’s lifespan, as it often felt he did.

Tony knows that.

Tony also feels his frustration building into violence, the will to _force_ Peter, to slap some sense into him–

 

“I sound just like my father,” he tastes bile in his mouth, but is far more disgusted to discover he was right.

* * *

 

Tony is surprised with many things in life, but his own stupidity never ceases to amaze him.

He hears Happy’s voice over the phone, telling him information between apologies, but it’s distant, muffled by an incredible inferno of fury that burns brightly in him. _Stupid_ , he tells himself, _Stupid stupid stUPID-!_ So fucking stupid, to think if he’d take the suit away from Peter, he’d take his will to fight along with it. It’s hours before the first written reports come in, hours staring with bloodshot eyes at his alcohol stash and wishing Pepper was beside him to keep him from doing another stupid thing, as he’s so terribly tempted to do, and clings to his sobriety with both of his hands. When the reports finally arrive, he reads them with rapt attention, every sentence a jab at his idiocy.

Peter risking his life, hanging fifteen thousand feet in the air. Engines blown away, fans that could’ve shredded through a person without even causing technical issues. Plane steered out of skyline like a sailboard, crashing into the sand. In the pictures, Tony sees shards of glass that were created by the fire.

Peter was there.

Peter was there, surviving the incident by sheer luck.

Tony Stark doesn’t believe in luck, because Tony might be stupid, but luck is _dumb_.

Peter was there, fighting in some sweatshirt and goggles instead of a fire-proof suit with a matching armor protecting his skull and his spine.

Peter was there because he’s the miraculous spider-bug, and somehow didn’t crash to his death, or froze to death in the ocean.

All because Tony was a fucking idiot with selective amnesia, who had conveniently forgot what it was like, when _he_ was fifteen and thought he knew better than everyone else.

The notion never faded, because Tony _does_ know better, and plans it do; works tirelessly to perfect what he already considered a perfect design, improving and polishing Peter’s suit to every extent his nightmares spill into, countless scenarios his anxiety fuels like gasoline onto the open flames of his anger.

Peter shouldn’t be an Avenger, Tony knows that; he’s far too young. But there’s a reason minors aren’t allowed certain decisions, and Tony knows he has to make the right ones for him; If Peter isn’t allowed to go to a tattoo parlor by himself, he sure as hell isn’t going to a battle without Tony by his side.

 

Better keep Peter here, when he can be monitored; where he can train; where he’d have armored glass for windows and three feet of concrete surrounding him when he sleeps. Where he’d be far away from all the wackjobs that roam New York city, from memories Peter wouldn’t want to remember, ones only distance and time could help scab over.

It’s Tony who dragged him into this, after all; a world where failure means death.

Peter Parker can’t fail. He won't. Not when Tony watches over him.

 

(If Tony ever entertained a thought, in passing, on how the children he’d never have could’ve been – and came back empty handed, when his brain couldn’t begin to fathom it –)

(Only if–)

 

(At the edges of his mind there’s a box that Tony would never open; but the hatch was already unlocked, and the thought inside of it is glowing and bright.)

(If Tony ever entertained such a thought, his mind would pick up that box and peer into it.)

 

(But Tony keeps his eyes wide shut.)

 

**Author's Note:**

> Feedback is much appreciated :)~!  
> (even though it might take me a bit to get back to you due to RL)
> 
> The only thing that bugged me this movie is that Happy seemed WAY OOC and uncharacteristically dickish??? So I assumed brain-injury. Kind of a bummer they keep using Happy as a scapegoat.  
> ALSO TONY. YOU SOUND NOTHING LIKE YOUR FATHER. NOTHING AT ALL LIKE HIM.


End file.
